A friend of mine and I have been having a long-standing argument about whose penis is larger. We've thought of having our girlfriends confirm to the other the exact size, but neither one of us trusts that. I don't want to see his penis and he doesn't want to see mine. I don't want my girlfriend looking at his penis and he doesn't was his looking at mine.
So... We just need a girl to look at both of our penises (individually) and then to tell us which one is bigger.
A regular box of popsicles includes cherry (my favorite), grape (so-so) and orange. I don't like the orange ones. I'm a grown-up and I don't have to eat them if I don't want to. On the other hand I can't bring myself to throw them away and I don't have children or grandchildren living in the area to give them to (assuming they would like them).
I currently have a bunch of orange popsicles in my freezer. If you want them,, let me know. If you are paranoid about them, don't be. Keep in mind they are all "factory sealed" and whoever takes them probably isn't going to end up on the 6:00 news because they were poisoned to death by orange popsicles.
Someone is going to want these things, so you better hurry. If things work out, maybe we could develop a "popsicles are ready for pickup" relationship whereby I send you an E-mail whenever the freezer is full.
Keep in mind that a box of 24 popsicles costs about $4.50 and you are only getting 1/3 of a box...or in this case 1/3 of several boxes. The point is I don't think you should consider driving from Cleveland for the orange popsicles. However, if you do and you are first, I will give them to you.
FAQ:
Q: Are the orange popsicles sugar free? A: Do I SOUND like someone why buys sugar free popsicles? No, they aren't.
Q. How many orange popsicles are currently available? A. As of 10:15 on 9/24 I have 17 of them.
This young and spicy reporter who is the (self-titled) "hottest reporter in Mexico" addressed the pictures she posted on Twitter and the comments she wrote calling the on-field football harassment "an embarrassment" and "uncomfortable".
"If a pair of jeans, a white blouse with bottoms is provocative than all the women are provocative because it's very common to dress like this," she said in an all-media interview.
I want to be a reporter and go into a woman's locker room and interview them half naked. I wonder how some of the players would feel.
I was raised to be aware of others and considerate of my surroundings, and I don't think dressing the way she does qualifies as either. Although some players did behave inappropriately or"immaturely", She continues to dress provocatively. But she asks " what's so provocative about a "a pair of jeans and a blouse"? Hmmm. That is a distraction on the practice field, and in a locker room full of young, mostly immature, naked football players - an incident waiting to happen.
What bothers me most is that Men are blamed in a publicity grabbing incident for being Men. Hey, if you got it, flaunt it. But at least give us some fries with that shake.
These are tense times. The future is uncertain. The Stock Market quivers with indecision. The November midterm elections are approaching. All of this uncertainty has produced some interesting candidates. But in my opinion none more entertaining than Christine O'Donnell from Delaware.
Here are two of her more famous quotes:
1. On the topic of stem cell research and human cloning: "they are doing that here in the United States. American scientific companies are cross-breeding humans and animals and coming up with mice with fully functioning human brains. So they're already into this experiment."
2. On the topic of telling a lie:
" O'DONNELL: A lie, whether it be a lie or an exaggeration, is disrespect to whoever you're exaggerating or lying to, because it's not respecting reality.
MAHER: Quite the opposite, it can be respect.
MAHER: What if someone comes to you in the middle of the Second World War and says, 'do you have any Jewish people in your house?' and you do have them. That would be a lie. That would be disrespectful to Hitler....
O'DONNELL: I believe if I were in that situation, God would provide a way to do the right thing righteously. I believe that!
MAHER: God is not there. Hitler's there and you're there.
O'DONNELL: You never have to practice deception. God always provides a way out. "
God works in mysterious ways. That's why he gave human brains to mice.
O'Donnell a former abstinence advocate, spent much of the nineties fighting against masturbation and pornography in addition to premarital sex and contraception. And back in the 90s, O'Donnell's appearance on MTV's "Sex In The 90s" TV show, has her claiming that masturbation is equal to adultery. But my favorite line is:
"If he can already please himself, then why am I in the picture?"
Like a heroin addict needs more dope , the US government needs more tax payer money, no matter where they get it. You couldn't give money to a worse lot than those in Washington: 14 trillion in debt, 800 billion failed stimulus , 2 no win no end wars , no way to pay unfunded liabilities , no air marshals, no safe borders ,etc.
Yes the fox is in charge of the chicken coop and the fox says I need your juicy chicken to watch. Are we just stupid enough to give it to them?
On the other hand.
The GOP has never taken care of the middle class. They will block any tax increase for the wealthy. That is their base. The gap between the wealthy and the middle class grew under Republican "leadership", special interest groups were granted every wish and No Bid Cheney took care of all of his buddies. With Karl Rove behind the scenes again using his scare tactics(mosque at ground zero), those that get all of their info from GOP propaganda sources(Rush, Beck, Palin) will send themselves to the slaughter house. GOP=Greedy Old Politicians.
"You cannot legislate the poor into freedom by legislating the wealthy out of freedom. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that, my dear friend, is about the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it."
- Adrian Rogers, 1931-2005
“Republicans take care of big money, for big money takes care of them.” - Will Rogers
Nearly half of the people who sell their houses with furniture included will take all the light bulbs out of all the lamps when they vacate the premises.
A person who drives 10 miles to buy a lottery ticket is 3 times more likely to be killed in a car accident while driving to buy the ticket... than... he is to win the jackpot.
80% of Americans say giving personal information (especially their credit card information) over the Internet scares the living shit out of them.
According to Employee Benefits Research Institute 96% of all people who have jobs right now won't be eligible for their full Social Security benefits when they reach age 65.
The average wedding in America costs a staggering $20,000.00.
Few people know it but, you can buy single-disease insurance.
